Bauer VS Nancy

I've been pondering on this for some time. Imagine that Jack Bauer from 24, is given the assignment to bust Nancy Botwin from Weeds. Now after much thought, I've come up with three highly likely scenarios in...

BAUER VS NANCY

1. Nancy seduces Bauer and fucks him on the hood of his car. She subsequently falls in love with him and marries him. However Bauer develops strong jealous feelings towards Conrad, whom Nancy have been secretly seeing, Bauer threatens to bring in CTU to "whop Nancy's sweet ass, unless she stops seeing that boy!", Nancy haves Bauer killed by Armenian drug lords.
2. Nancy seduces Bauer, with some difficulty, and persuades him to join her in the drug dealing business. Bauer prefers to water and care for the cannabis plants, and suddenly a revelation hits him, something he's been suspecting for some time actually, but been to busy really thinking about, he is in fact a homophobic trapped in a homosexual body. After shrugging of many passes by Sanjay, who is in his opinion "too ethnic", he develops a crush for Nancy's oldest son Silas, Nancy haves Bauer killed by U-turns gang.
3. Nancy seduces Bauer. While playing around in the greenhouse, Bauer persuades Nancy to engage in some friendly BSDM, Bauer ties Nancy up, but his "physical interrogation" training suddenly kicks in when he sees the naked tied-down Nancy, and he accidentally kills her with a nearby rake. Bauer claims self-defence in court gives a moving speech about democracy and freedom, and the charges against him is dropped. Andy haves Bauer killed by the mexicans.
   

So there you have it! Now you don't have to go around and wonder like I did.